Trust

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How do we know whom to trust and whom not to? Is that instinctive or do we learn on the fly? Some people, who seem nice initially, often turn out to be backstabbers. How do we discern between such people?

Trust is a relative term to actually describe the state-of-mind of a person. What is the person thinking? What are his / her circumstances? What is their behavioral pattern? Are they following a pattern that they have accustomed themselves with while growing up?

I have observed, usually a person breaks trust due to some underlying motivations. Some of the common denominators are greed, envy, anger and lust. These people might not be bad, but they are just motivated to act upon their strong urges. If they can rein themselves in, they can do great work. They, however, give in to their human frailty.

Anyway, back to the original query. How do we know whom to trust and whom not to? I guess, we will never know. There isn’t any inbuilt radar that can tell us if a person is trustworthy or not. Yes, at times our instincts do warn us, but other than that it is all a gamble. Maybe, testing people over a period of time may help us find the ones to keep for a lifetime, but that’s a time consuming affair.

There was a time when I used to trust everyone and eliminated them as they broke my trust one-by-one. It took an emotional toll, especially when I ended up giving them second or even third chances. These days, everyone starts at zero. It’s a neutral ground. No biases but no expectations either. I have become much more guarded too, not allowing many to enter into my life. Actually, none for many years now. I have a close set of people, and I fiercely value them. Guess, as we age, we become wiser. We don’t need the noise of many people around us, but prefer the soothing whispers or at times the silence of a few who truly matter.

Comments

  1. Afshan ShaikApril 24, 2022 at 7:30 AM

    I hav been victim of trusting people easily too and getting back stabbed...and then again giving them chances ..now i think i feel if i was good or was i a big time idiot?? :) Now adays yes i too guard myself a lot . My sanity more important than anything else. I hav a v small close knit circle....this post resonated with me. I read about my self :)

    Good day

    Dropping by from a to z "The Pensive"

    ReplyDelete
  2. Alice GerardApril 24, 2022 at 10:12 AM

    I have a difficult time with trust because I, too, trusted too easily and people took advantage of that. I have to work on my boundaries, which isn't easy when your natural instinct is to want to trust people and let them in and not realize what their motives are. This post was very meaningful to me.

    ReplyDelete
  3. DinoApril 24, 2022 at 10:20 AM

    This is such a difficult thing, especially when it goes wrong and you get hurt, but it's also hard to let that hurt define one's trust further relationships.
    I'm thankful for a wife of 30+ years who I know that I know I can trust, as for the rest...

    Visiting from Facing The Mountain

    ReplyDelete
  4. Janet WoodApril 24, 2022 at 10:17 PM

    It is sad we get jaded from our bad past experiences. I used to be a very trusting person. I still trust people but not completely. I don't let them in as easily as I used to. I guess you can say I hold everyone at an arms length. But I still have hope that I can go back to how I once was.

    Just visiting from A-Z
    https://janetwoodsthoughts.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dave RollerApril 25, 2022 at 10:34 AM

    Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding. Acknowledge the Lord in of your ways and He shall make your path straight. Proverbs 3:5+^

    ReplyDelete

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