Zahir si baat hai…

I always believed that every woman should read Coelho Paulo’s “The Zahir”. I have myself recommended/gifted this book to at least a dozen women, and each one of them had thanked me, and we had talked at length about how they could identify with it and how it helped them gaining a deeper perspective about their own lives.

The book is almost intuitive for women. It speaks to us, talking about a quest that we understand, a language that is familiar. We are already in midst of our struggle as women, and this book somehow assures us that we are on the right path, that we know what it means to love, and how, that is all that is there. It just calms and soothes us.

Ironically, the book is written from a man’s perspective, his journey to find himself, through his efforts to find his wife, who has left him without any explanation. As he carefully peels the layers of his wife’s life, he starts learning about his own path too. While this should have been an interesting read for a man too, I haven’t yet come across a single man who had actually liked the book. Most have been dismissive about it. They don’t feel comfortable talking about the book too.

It had baffled me before, but now I guess I know why. The Zahir makes you re-look at your own life, it forces you to acknowledge things that you comfortably want to keep at bay. It is about challenging your world-order. While women have been up against the world each day, men have somehow become complacent. Their only thought is to live up to the standards set by the society. Gone are the challenges of surviving or protecting the family or community. Life has become easy, and men are comfortably sinking into this ease, forgetting their primal core. Contrary to it, women, who had been suppressed so far, are recognizing their potential and are awakening their core to create a niche for themselves.

Problem is this is no race. While men dominated the first half and women are slowly inching towards their dominance, we will never achieve balance if both of them do not work together. If love is lost, nothing will remain.

Somehow nature has an answer. It has created women as the natural nurturer. If she finds her place in the world without losing her compassion and loving nature, she could show the path to others too. Women do not need to become like men, they just need to find their power within. While men do not need to follow the societal dictum, instead, they need to trust their inner voice, the primal core.

And, guess everyone should read “The Zahir.” Here’s an excerpt from the book. Pick it up if it resonates with you, pick it up even if it doesn’t!

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“Do you see this? The cloth is actually green; it looks black because it’s caked with dried blood. A soldier somewhere in the world asked her before he died to remove his shirt, then cut it into tiny pieces and distribute those pieces to anyone capable of understanding the message of his death. Do you have a piece?”…

Mikhail took out the piece of bloodstained cloth and put it down in front of him.

“This is part of the unknown soldier’s shirt. Before he died, he said to the woman: ‘Cut up my clothes and distribute the pieces among those who believe in death and who, for that reason, are capable of living as if today were their last day on earth. Tell those people that I have just seen the face of God; tell them not to be afraid, but not to grow complacent either. Seek the one truth, which is love. Live in accordance with its laws.’”

They all gazed reverently at the piece of cloth.

“We were born into a time of revolt. We pour all our enthusiasm into it, we risk our lives and our youth, and suddenly, we feel afraid, and that initial joy gives way to the real challenges: weariness, monotony, doubts about our own abilities. We notice that some of our friends have already given up. We are obliged to confront loneliness, to cope with sharp bends in the road, to suffer a few falls with no one near to help us, and we end up asking ourselves if it’s worth all that effort.”

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Someday, I want to talk about Emily Bronte’s “Wuthering Heights”. I had fallen in love with this book the instant I read it, just like most women. The converse is true for most men. Definitely, a book I want to talk about someday.